Friday, November 20, 2009

"Vogon Care" and Saturday Night Lies

I'm tired of "Obamacare", "Pelosicare", and "Reidcare". Lame. Let's get creative! How about "Shadow care"? "We Really Don't Care about You care"? "Enjoy Your Time in Prison care"?

My personal favorite is "Vogon care". Vogons, of course, are the galactic bureaucrats from Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy. According to the Guide, "Vogons are one of the most unpleasant races in the galaxy. Not actually evil, but bad-tempered, bureaucratic, officious and callous."

Sounds like the people trying to ram socialism -- err -- healthcare reform down our throats. I'll take it! "Vogon care" it is! Vogons, like Pelosi, Reid, Obama, etc., are also in favor of death panels, because they won't even save their grandmothers from the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal without all of the necessary (and unnecessary) paperwork.

Similarly, don't let your Congressmen or Congresswomen read you poetry -- it will be as malicious, incomprehensible, tortuous and nauseating as their 2,074-page healthcare bill.

Speaking of which...

Senate Democrats have cleared the way for a Saturday night vote to begin the healthcare debate, a Democratic aide said.

Sen. Tom Coburn (R-Okla.) has agreed to relent on his demand for Senate clerks to read aloud the 2,074-page bill and allow the chamber to take a critical test vote, said the aide. Reading the bill on the Senate floor was estimated to take as many as 30 hours or longer, raising the possibility of the Senate staying in session into next week.

Heaven forbid United States senators put in any overtime in debating the most dastardly piece of legislation ever assembled in the Senate. Thirty hours for 2,074 pages comes out to almost 70 minutes of debate a page. Instead, there will be no reading of the bill, and the Senate will take a vote at 8 pm Saturday night to end debate on a motion to move forward with the bill.

Not only haven't these senators read the bill, but these Saturday night vote fests are getting more than just a little worrisome. The House passed this bill on a Saturday night, and now the Senate is trying to end debate on a Saturday night. I might be mistaken, but constituents can't call their senators' office at 8 pm on a Saturday night, now can they? So glad our elected officials are looking out for our best interest.

Hey, waddya know? Another similarity they have with Vogons.

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